Broken
by Jenna360
Summary: Feliciano has been depressed for a long time, but refused to show it on the outside. Will that all change due to a new student? GerIta, High school AU
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! This is literally my first story, So I hope you Enjoy it! :D And if you dont, then please dont leave rude comments! Thanks ^_^.**

* * *

Broken  
Chapter One

Feliciano sat on the couch with a fake smile on his face. Behind his smile was years and years of sadness and depression,yet the only one who knew that was his twin brother Lovino. He knows what he has been through, he knows how unfair it is, he knows deep down he is hurting. What he doesnt know is why he still holds onto everything even though all hope is lost. If Lovino was in his shoes he wouldave commited suicide already.

But Feliciano was strong, He fought the pain that ached his heart, He dealed with the thought of his childhood love never to return. He forced a smile even know he really, REALLY wanted to cry. Most of all he ignored the bully's who made fun of him.

At High School, Feliciano sat in the back of the class. Eveyday was the same. Sit in class, Do work, Be teased, Then do more work. But today was different. Today there was a new student in class. He had slicked back blonde hair, Blue eye's, and had serious muscles.

"Hallo, My name is Ludwig Beildsmidt." He said quickly as for he seemed to just want to get it over with. The teacher looked around for an empty seat and directed him to an empty desk next to Feliciano. He raised his head up from the desk and waved to the new male, 'smileing' as he did so. Ludwig did a slight wave back

Just as the new guy began takeing notes a few snickers came out from his left side, A.K.A where Alfred F. Jones was sitting. He had to be one of the most annoying person in the world, He was also the main cause of Feli's bullying. Him and His friends would walk up to the teen at lunch time and study hall just to mock and be mean to him. Ludwig looked to his side at the other male, then went back to takeing notes. Then again another snicker from the left side. He just ignored it and went back to work. Another snicker and now Ludwig was annoyed, He sent a dark glare in the direction of the chatty, snickery, American.

Feliciano nudged Ludwig with his elbow, trying to get his attention for some reason. He looked to his right and softened his look. "Ja?" He asked, wondering what the guy wanted.

"Can you read what the board says in the bottom left corner? I see it says 'Bereiten Sie sich für ein Quiz am kommenden Mittwoch' But im not sure what it means." He said.

Ludwig quickly replied. "It says 'Prepare for a quiz next wednesday'. It says it in German, So im guessing its a German quiz?"

Feliciano groaned and nodded. "Si, It is. Im most likely going to fail again, Since I suck at German."

"Well..Im fluent in German. I know its my first day here, but if you want.. I could help you study."

"Really? Would you?"

Ludwig nodded. "Sure."

* * *

Class ended quite quickly while Feliciano and Ludwig were talking the whole time (Well mostly Feliciano was talking, but every now and then Ludwig would speak.) The only reason the two relised class was over is because of the lunch bell ringing, And boy, did Feliciano love lunch!

Grasping the paper bag in one hand, he grabbed Ludwig's in the other, Causing him to blush a bit, because he wasnt used to his hand being held, even as a child. Feliciano was just being affectionate, as his did with the people who were his friends and family...And maybe some pretty girls, but only 50% of the time it would work, considering the young male had a reputation as a 'loser' or a 'loner'. Sometimes the poor kid would be tagged as a nobody, Yet he had a few friends. Their names where Matthew, Antonio, Francis, Lovino, and his new friend Ludwig.

Noticing his group of friends at their normal lunch table he sat down, along with Ludwig. "Ciao guys!~ This is my new friend Ludwig!" He emphisised.

Antonio smiled to him saying. "Im Antonio, But you can call me Tonio for short like everyone else."

The perverted one (A.K.A Francis) went behind the stranger and whispered into his ear. "My name is francis, You should remeber that because you will be screaming my name later!~" which made the other flinch and move over a bit to the side.

Matthew waved slowly, and shyly. While Lovino just grunted and looked away, He instantly didnt like the new student. He was afraid that the other would be cruel to Feliciano, or use him. After that a whole conversation was started, As usual it ended in yells and from Lovi. Seemingly out of nowhere, an albino appeared, he sat next to Francis and Antonio, They seemed to know eachother, Ludwig seemed to know the albino.

"Hallo, Bruder! Made some new friends I see." He said with his cocky grin.

Ludwig frowned. His brother could be really, REALLY annoying! He most deffinetly didnt want to sit near him, but since he didnt want to ditch his new friend he remained seated and began to eat.

At home Feliciano was writing in his journal, He mainly had poem's in there but today he was laying down on his bed with a pencil in his hand writing an entry.

"_Today at school I met a new guy named Ludwig, Veh He seems to be nice, but fratello always tells me to be aware at all time's because anytime, anywhere, a person could be rude. So I guess i'll have to wait and see how he is~_  
_~Feliciano_."

Once he finished writing this he looked at the clock.

_1:30_

He decided it was his best option to go to bed, so he did. He took off his clothes and hopped into bed. After about five minuates he was asleep, and was even snoreing to prove it.

* * *

**Well, I tried my best xD Anyways, this chapter was a little short, so i'll make the next chapter longer, I promise! Well..I'll try at least. **


	2. Chapter 2

Broken  
Chapter Two

"_È stupido bastardo sbadato! Non sapete Feliciano fa male nel profondo? Non vi preoccupate per il vostro maledetto pronipote?"_ Yelled Lovino, Waking Feliciano right up. The Italian wished to know what was going on so he continued to listan in.

"_Mi dispiace Lovino, ma non ho idea di che cosa il vostro parlando. Feliciano sembra un ragazzo molto felice, voglio dire, è sempre sorridente_." Countered Roma, their grandpa who was their caretaker.

The younger man scoffed and spoke again. "Fine, Dont belive me that he's unhappy! Just let him live without careing for him in his current condition." With that said, he walked out of the living room where he was arguing with and entered the bedroom. A few moment's passed without a word from either of the two. Finally Feliciano decided that he was going to speak up.

"Fratello.. Were you and nonno arguing?"

"Si, nonno was being an un-conciterite, bastard." He began, as he wrapped an arm around his brother in attempts to confort him. "But we dont have to worry about that, okay?"

"Okay..Hey Lovi, Shouldent we be getting ready to go to school soon? I mean look at the time, we have thirty-five minuates." The elder twin nodded and they began to start their morning routine. Get dressed, check! Brush hair, check! Eat brekfest, check! Pack lunch, check! Grab backpack, check! All was ready for the day so the duo began to walk to the bus station, hopeing they didnt miss the bus, because if they did they would have to walk causing them to be late. As they approuched the bus stop the bus was there. 'thank god!' Feliciano exclaimed in his mind.

Just as the bus came to a stop they arrived at the high school. Feliciano grabbed his brother's sleeve and began to run to their class. They both knotched up their speed until their legs refused to go any faster, which people would usually think was slow but when in retreat mode or get-to-class-or-get-detention mode it was pretty fast.

Lovino saw the door open in their classroom and dragged them both in, assuring they where NOT late.

"Oh, good! You two made it on time, I was just about to list you as absent but your here now." Said the teacher, checking Feliciano and Lovino's names on the list. Their teacher was very nice, even one time when they actually were late she let it pass, Maybe it was because it was only a few minuates late, or maybe it was because the two had a perfect attendance and didnt want to mess around with it. Either way she was still nice in their eyes.

Feliciano took his seat next to Ludwig and waved to him.

Lovino glared at the German when he looked away.

Class began and the teacher went on and on about the art of somthing, not really paying attention Feliciano began to doodle on his papers. One of his pictures had dark shades and clouds followed by rain and fire. 'Must be expressing his emotions' Lovino though, glancing at the drawing paper.. Some other things he drew were important people to him. Mostly he drew his brother, and his friends. Somtimes when he felt alone and abandonded he would draw a picture of himself being completly ignored by everyone as they walked away.

Ms.Héderváry (the teacher), Skimmed her green eyes through the class landing them on the doodleing boy. She slowly inched her way over to him untill she stood right behind him. The class was full of gasps and dead-silance, usually Ms.Héderváry only walked over to people when they were about to get in trouble. She tapped the italian on the shoulder and he turned around looking at her.

"Feliciano, I do appriciate you enjoying to draw but please, dont draw in class while im teaching." She smiled sweetly at him as he nodded putting the paper back into his desk.

The class continued with no further interuptions until another teacher emerged into the classroom.

"Elizaveta! Can you help me with somthing?" Asked a medium-heighted man with brown hair and some sort of hair sticking out from the top, a little different then Feliciano or Lovino's.

She exscused herself and left the room to go do whatever it is that , the music teacher, wanted her to help out with.

* * *

Once again it was lunch time and pretty much the same thing happened, except for the whole introduction. Only one thing was off, Feliciano was getting spit balls, spat at him. The first time he let it pass, the seccond time he looked back to see who was spitting them at him. To his dismay it was none other then Alfred.

"Will you please stop spitting those at me?" He asked politely. Yet the American completly ignored his request and continued to spit them.

Next up Lovino turned back to the others, giving them a glare that said If-you-dont-stop-doing-that-your-going-to-be-yelled-at. When that failed Ludwig stood up, ready to defend his friend. "Will you stop that!" He yelled. Alfred just continued to spit and spit until his tounge was dry. Ludwig had an idea, a crazy idea. but still an idea. He took out a straw and sent back spit balls. Wrong choice!

In the matter of about five minuates the whole caffateria ended up in a food fight. Tomato's were being thrown, spagetti was being flung, fruits were being squished and eventually the princapal came in looking horrified. "Students! Tell me, Who started this?" All the finger's were being pointed to Ludwig and Alfred's table, so everyone sitting there were immedietly sent to the princapals office.

"Sorry I got you in trouble, Feliciano." Ludwig said, sitting on a chair in the office.

Feliciano giggled a bit. "Its alright, It was sort of worth it. That food fight was the most fun I had in a LONG time!"

Lovino looked over to his brother pouting. "But I thought you said the most fun you had was when me and you went to the zoo a couple weeks ago!"

"Yeah, I ment that was the most fun I had in school, out of school that would be the most fun."

"Oh..Okay."

Alfred nudged Feliciano, his crew behind him covering up chuckles. "Hey dude! If that caffiteria was a war then you would have died! All you did the whole time was hide under the table pleading like a little girl, for protection. Any reason for that, wimp?"

Feliciano's smile, turned into a frown. "I dont like war, or ever when people argue. It makes me feel sad. I dont understand why people cant just be nice to one-another and stop fighting."

"Hah! Dude, you totally sound like one of those people on tv. that try to convince people to stop bullying. Lame-o!"

Ludwig had enough from this guy, he moved his friend to the side and crossed his arms looking at the other male. "Stop." He said sternly.

"No way dude! Cant you see that he deserves it? He's like, so un-herolike! 'Cause im the hero and hero's need to stop evil vilans and-"

"Hero's dont make fun of people, which from what i've been seeing you do to Feliciano, you've been making fun of him, therefore you are not a hero."

"But everyone makes fun of him!"

Ludwig looked back at the Italian "Is this true?" after he nodded he patted his back. "I feel bad for you. You know what, If anyone is being mean to you, tell me and i'll convince them to do otherwise."

"Grazi, Luddy! Oh yeah, Luddys a nick-name I made for you. Do you like it?" He asked as he began to cling onto him, asking him a bunch of questions at once.

* * *

Back at home Feliciano grabbed his journal, pen and began to write into it.  
"_Today was..Alright..We had a food fight at luch time, I have to admit that was pretty fun! Anyways, Today Alfred was being mean to me again, I dont understand why people dont like me, I never did anything to them so what do they have agenst me? Also this morning I heard nonno and fratello arguing, I dont like it when they do that."_

He looked at what he previously wrote tapping his pen thinking of what else to write down.

"_Oh and Luddy (My new nick name for Ludwig) stood up for me today! It made me feel true happiness to know that I had at least one supporter other then my brother, I havent felt true happiness in a long,long time. Okay now time for some bad news that will dissapoint fratello. I began cutting again, He never liked when I did it back then because 1. He hated to see me in pain, and 2. He was afraid that I would cut a major artarie causing myself to bleed to death but i know where and where not to cut. Thats pretty much all I have to say today. So..Goodnight!_  
_~Feliciano_"

He returned his journal back to where it was originaly placed, hidden in one of the secret drawers of his desk. As soon as he hid it knowing most likely nobody could find it he laid down in bed, drifting into a deep, deep sleep.

Lovino however was not asleep, He knew it was rude to look through other people's stuff, but he usually went through Feliciano's, making sure that he wasnt planning on ending his life short like he tried to do once, last year. Ever since that day he was extra over-protective of him, fearing that if somone slipped up and said the wrong thing he would attempt again.

Lovi looked through the drawers finally finding the right one with the journal in it. "Bingo.." He whispered. Slowly he turned through the pages, nothing so far that he could see. Then at that very moment he reached the entry he just wrote, his eyes skimming it. The Italian never did like it at all when his brother cut, but he couldent let him know that he intruded his stuff, so he had to keep quiet about it. Maybe eventually he would tell him about it anyways. If not, then he would just have to have another brother-to-brother talk.

Returing the journal to its original place, Or so he thought, He made his way over to his bed drifting into sleep.

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**~Translations~**

**È stupido bastardo sbadato! Non sapete Feliciano fa male nel profondo? Non vi preoccupate per il vostro maledetto pronipote?**  
**You stupid careless bastard! Dont you know Feliciano is hurting deep down inside? Dont you care about your damn great-grandson?**

**Mi dispiace Lovino, ma non ho idea di che cosa il vostro parlando. Feliciano sembra un ragazzo molto felice, voglio dire, è sempre sorridente.**  
**I'm sorry Lovino, but I have no idea what your talking about. Feliciano looks like a very happy boy, I mean he IS always smiling.**

**I just relised both the endings to the chapters endind with them falling asleep. I think I need to have a little chat with myself about endings and how it should leave people in suspence OTL**

**Anyways, I hoped you liked this chapter ^_^**  
**Until the next update Asta-La-Pasta~ xD**


	3. Chapter 3

Broken  
Chapter Three

Once again Feliciano woke up in the morning,he hopped out of bed and opened his clothing drawer and to his supprise he saw his journal next to his school uniform. 'Huh? I thought I put this in my secret drawer..' he thought. Looking at his sleeping brother he grew a worried look in his eyes, and his face paled. Lovino couldave been the only person that would be in his room, Roma has already been to bed before them so his brother was the only exlplaination.

Feliciano hoped he didnt read the latest entry or else he would know that he went back to cutting. He looked at his wrist which were covered in cuts. Usually they wernt visable because he covered them up with bracelets, or he would wear long sleved shirts. No one ever noticed that, he supposed it was a good thing. For now, at least.

As soon as Lovino awakened the morning routine was set again, This time they made it early so they could hang out with their friends before class started. Feli went over to Ludwig and hugged him slightly. "Ciao Luddy!~"

"Hallo, Feliciano."

"Ve, Today I made it early! Im happy I get to talk to you more!" The excited italian said to his friend, bouncing up and down on his feet.

"Ja, I see that. Anyways, how about today I help you study German like I promised two days ago. I'm terriably sorry I couldent do it on those two days I was a bit busy."

A small smile blossomed on his face. "Si! Si! Today is perfect!"

"Okay, i'll be over you house at.." He thought for a moment. "Seven tonight, is that Okay?"

'No, Thats not okay..' He thought, thinking of how embarresing his grandpa could be somtimes. What he really said was "Sure!~"

The bell rang and all of the student's, inside and outside scrambled into the school. Some walked slowly balencing their huge pile of books in their arms, Others ran barging into other people, causing them to crash into lockers. Sadly Feliciano was one of the victim's being shoved into the outside of a locker's hard, steel.

Instantly the smile that he had fadded and they were replaced by big, fat, wet tears. His brother didnt seem to notice that he fell, so he continued on walking. Ludwig on the other hand did, and rushed over to his side. "Are you okay?" He questioned, setting his hand out allowing him to grab it and stand up.

"Yeah, Im fine. It hurt a bit but not as much as-" He began. "Nevermind."

Ludwig gave a confused look on his face, wondering what the other thing was that hurt more then being shoved into a steel locker. "What is it that hurt more then being pushed into steel? I mean, That mustave hurt ALOT."

Feliciano just shook his head at the man "Nothing, Just-Just forget about it, okay?" He admired that the man cared about him, but he didnt really want him to know that he cut himself, he was afraid that if the other found out that he would think that he was weird and not be his friend anymore.

His friend looked hopefully into his golden-brown eye. "Please, Just tell me."

The Italian decided that he would just show him, his wrist. If that didnt explain it all to him he would have to take out the little knife he keeps deep in his pocked that he brings everwhere incase he gets the urges to cut during school. So he rolled up his sleve exposing the scarred arms. The German's face was shocked, He thought since he met him two days ago, that Feliciano was a happy, carefree person. He was wrong. Very wrong.

To his suprise there were even more on his other arm, He felt like he needed to help him get over this somehow. Its not good to cut, He knows that because he known a girl that cut. She ended up dying in the hospital due to blood loss. The German was at loss of words, so he wrapped his arms around the younger boy. "Cutting is no good. I know that. Please Feliciano, Consider quitting."

"B-but.." He said nervously. "I tried once, But then all of my sadness came back. The only way to stop the pain was to-"

"There's other ways to stop pain other then doing this." He inturrepted, Looking very seriously at the other. "This will just continue to cause physical pain, and leave physical scars. There are many other ways to get over the problems."

"How?" He asked.

"Well, You could go and talk to family or close friends about your problem's. You could use a stress ball, and every time you get urges squeeze it. You can go to rehab.." Ludwig looked away and softly whispered somthing that sounded like 'But then I would miss you too much.' Indeed somtimes he could be a bit annoying, Feliciano was Ludwig's only friend, and its rumored that he might have a crush on him.

After saying that he held him closer to his chest. "Please, For me, Open your eye's and think, People will miss you if someday you bleed out accidently."

Feliciano nodded and looked up to Ludwig, leaning in to kiss him when..

BRIIINNG! BRIIINNG! BRIIINNG!

The final bell rang and inturrupted their moment. The two snapped back into reality and ran to their class room, when finally arriving, sat in the seats.

* * *

Art class passed with nobody -not even Alfred and his crew- making fun of Feliciano, Most likely due to him becomming friends with Ludwig, who vowed to hit anyone who even sent a glare in his general direction.

Next class was Math. Feliciano highly disliked math, but he knew it was very important to get a good job later on in life, so he tried his best in class. Ludwig was fairly well at math, Infact it was one of his best subjects. As the class walked into class they saw the teacher with a-what it looked like assistant, he had dark brown hair and choclate brown eyes, By the looks of it he was japanese.

The students took their seats and the teacher waved to them all. "Ni-Hao, My name is , I will be your new math teacher due to some issue's between the old math teacher and the princpal." He sent a smile towards everyone and brought the japanese boy to the center of the class. "This is my son, Kiku Honda. I adopted him when he was but only a few years old."

Kiku grew a blush upon his face. "Kon'ichiwa, As he said I am Kiku Honda."

Some girls in class giggled and chatted agenst eachother talking about how adorable they thought he was, as he passed by to take an empty seat, one in which was on the other side of Feliciano. "Ciao, Kiku! My name is Feliciano!"

"Hai! I heard about you on the way to class."

"Veh?~ You did? Who was talking about me?"

"Some guy with bushy eyebrows, English accent, Emrald eyes. Know him?"

Yes, Yes he did know him. He happened to be one of Alfred's friends. He frowned again. "Si, I do. His name is Arthur Kirkland." He thought of the time he was put in cooking class with him and he was forced to eat his cooking, which to say in nicest form of words, was terriable.

"Is there somthing wrong with him you seem..Upset."

"Well..He could be sort of a jerk, and he forces people to eat his cooking and his cooking and terriable! One time he gave me one of his scone thingy's and it gave me the stomach flu for a few weeks."

"Oh.." The Jap said returning to whatever he was writing on the paper.

Feliciano went back to taking notes and every-now-and-then doodleing some small pictures of pasta or pizza. This Italian always had an empty stomach when it came to eating pizza, pasta, or pretty much anything else that involved tomato's.

Class finally began and all the eye's were on the teacher. He took out a stack of papers going through the row's handing one to each student, returning to the front of class he clasped his hands together. "Okay, Today we are going to test your mathimatical ability's to decided what group you will be placed in, and where your permenant seats will be for the year. You may begin."

Instantly Feliciano knew he would be seperated from Ludwig, since he knew he was great at alot of academic's. Hopefully he would at least he wouldent have to sit with Alfred or creepy Ivan. Actually he was hopeing that he could just sit alone if he and his friend got seperated. But he guessed that Kiku might be alright, but it was hard to tell since his face shown barely any expression while he was talking to him.

An hour later everyone was finishing up their test's. Feliciano was the last person to get up and put his paper on the desk.

stood up and cleared his throught before speaking. "Now, I will be scoreing these. So for the next thirty minuates you can do whatever you want." He sat back down and began to grade the pile of tests.

Feliciano scooted over to Ludwig and began talking to him about Pasta, Food, His brother, etc. Kiku sat by himself still writing somthing, The Italian was beginning to get curious of what he was writing so he brought the German with him over to the Japanese fellow and tapped his shoulder.

Kiku looked up at the teen, blushing a bit.

"Whatchya' writing?~"

"Well-Well..Um..Im writing a story."

"What type of story? Can I see?"

Kiku shook his head rapidly, blushing furiously. "N-no..I dont think you'll find an intrest in what I am writing."

"Pleeasee?" He whined.

"..Fine.." He passed the paper over to the boy.

His eye's skimmed the paper, and soon he began to blush aswell. It indeed was a story, A rather good story too. He now knew why he didnt want to show it to him at first, Because if he, himself wrote it he would most likely keep it to himself like with his poem's. Shaking holding all back not to show what was going on with him he flung the paper back to Kiku, ran over to and asked to go to the bathroom.

Feliciano ran through the halls, passed his brothers ELA class, and landed himself in the stall of the boys bathroom. The story he read was a sexual encounterment story betwen two men. Very farmilliar names aswell. One named Ludwig, and one named Feliciano with the exact appearance of them too. 'Is Kiku a ninja or somthing? How did he know our names? We havent even met him before.' He thought.

Not long later Feliciano started jerking off. It wasnt his fault! That story was pretty damn hot!

He stopped when he heard the door creek open. Fastly he zippered up his pants, fixed his hair up (carefull of the curl, or else he wouldave had to go through that again.) and stepped out of the stall. Right at the moment he didnt even care who that was, all he knew was that he needed to get back to class before people started to question why he was in the bathroom so long.

When the Italian returned all eye's where on him, not even 's eye's where off of him.

All was quiet, even Alfred who opened his mouth to speak but closed it afterall. Feliciano looked around class he didnt see Ludwig. He knew it wasnt a good idea to ask where he was because it would mean breaking the dead-silance but he did anyways. "Hey, Where did Ludwig go?"

"Bathroom...We thought...And..Yeah.." Said a very confused American.

* * *

Later on in the day Feli was still getting stares. He couldent wait untill school was over. It came earlier then expected, and he began walking home with Lovino.

"Feli." He began. "I heard a rumor about what happened during math class."

"And..?"

"I wanted to know if it was true."

He stopped himself, staring at the green grass, not responding.

"Answer me."

"What was the rumor?"

"That you jer-"

"Yes..Yes it is true."

Ignoreing any further awkwarness they both seized to talk all the way home, which wasnt very far. Lovino took the key from under the doormat and unlocked the door. Remebering Ludwig was coming over later Feliciano had a little talk with his grandpa about embarresing him.

~~~A Couple Hours Later~~~

Ding~Dong!

Feliciano raced to the door, opening it only to see his friend Ludwig. The two walked their way over to Feliciano's room and began to study. After studying Ludwig talked to Feliciano about cutting again and how it was a bad thing to be doing, Next they talked for a few hours.

It came time when Ludwig was needed to go home, so before he left he got a peck on the lips from Feliciano, Dazed at first he stood there blushing. Then he became very happy running home he rubbed it into his brother's face he got a kiss.

Feliciano brought his pen to his journal.

"_I think i'm in love.._  
_~Feliciano_"

* * *

**Welp there Chapter Three..I dont know. At first I liked this chapter but as time went on and i grew more and more tired (Its literally 1:39 and I just finished this chapter xD) and got lazy describing things and focused in on Feli and stuff and it seems a bit bad to me. Tell me what you thought of it.**  
**LOL and about him jerking off I..um..have a very dirty mind and if i get better at writing smut this may or may not have it in this story xD**  
**Oh and now we have Japan and more GerIta :D**

**Until Chapter 4**  
**SAYONARA!**


	4. Chapter 4

Broken  
Chapter Four  
Feliciano's POV:

Today was Thursday, The day of the test. Since I only got one day to study I knew I would most likely fail, Which worried me because I never failed anything before, I got low grade's but never an 'F'. Another reason I was reluctantly walking to school is because of what happened yesterday, I was sure EVERYONE knew about the incident. When I reached the double-door's I let out a sigh and could already feel as if I was gaining a bunch of stare's, There were some people laughing too! I know it!

Midway to homeroom I got cutting urge's again, Most likely due to being stressed out about the test and had a lot of pressure going on in my head. I relise that I promised fratello and Luddy that I would stop but, the urge's right now were too strong to handle. I looked down the hall, noticing that the bathroom wasnt too far from homeroom. Maybe some cutting before class would get me calmed down for the German Test, I clearly wasnt ready for. Speedwalking to the bathroom I completly ignored all the people I assumed were stareing. Once I got settled in one of the stall's I took out my army knife I used for cutting, that was secretly hidden in my sock everyday incase the urge's came back. Today was the day, that it would be put to some use.

I leaned over the toilet (So no blood would get on the floor.) and began to slit my wrist, the first time it stung a bit so I let out a little gasp. Then one turned into two, two into three and soon I just watched as my crimson blood began to drain into the toilet making it a reddish color. It was at that moment I relised I had no bandage's to cover up my self-made cut's, No way to make the blood seize to flow out my wrist.

Slowly, my vision fadded and I could no longer see what's going on, Or hear anything, My hole body felt numb. I honestly thought that I had died.

* * *

Lovino's POV:

We waited anxiously in the hospital waiting for the doctor to come back with the information, If your wondering who 'we' was, It's me, Antonio and Potato bastard.. I still dont understand why he decided to come, this was nothing concering him... Deep in my thought's I didn't notice when the doctor came in, that was until he was right in front of me, coughing in a matter that instantly got my attention.

The man was in a white lab-coat and had short gray hair, He held a clipboard in one hand and a pen in the other.

"He'll most likely awaken soon, but I would like to advise you to not barbarge him with question's when he first awakens, It might startle him." The doctor said, to my relif.

I let out a sigh, knowing my fratello would be okay was good news. Now all we needed to do was wait for him to wake up and everything will go back to normal..Actually, I dont think I want everything to go back to normal. Back to normal mean's that he'll continue to cut, so I guess I want this to teach him a lesson. A lesson to no longer cut, though it may take a little longer until he relises that this is serious.

Some time passed and fratello was finally begining to awaken, he rubbed his eye with the back of his hand, yawned and looked around with a puzzled look on his face.

"W-where am I?" He asked.

Antonio stood up and gave him a half-hearted smile. "Your in a hospital, appearently you fainted due to blood loss. But everything's better now, the doctor even say's you are most likely going to be released from here either today or tomorrow!~"

Feli gave a smile back, I knew it wasnt a real one. If I were in this situation I would DEFINETLY not be smileing! But him being him and trying to make people happy -even though he is unhappy himself- just force's a smile on his face.

Potato bastard was next to stand up, he walked over to my fratellino. I still didn't trust that guy, no matter what people say, I still don't trust him...Maybe it's just me being a little over-protective though..But being overprotective was needed when you had a brother like mine!

Anyway's the potato bastard kneeled down to my brother's level and softly said to him. "I-I feel like this is my fault.." He began, but why did he feel like it was his fault? UNLESS HE BROKE FELI'S HEART IN THAT CASE I'LL GET THE MAFIA ON HIS SORRY ASS! "I should have met up with you before class so I could talk you out of-" He was interrupted by a sweet, soft kiss given by my brother. Holy. Fucking. Shit. My brother just kissed a bastard, What the fuck?! I felt like yelling at the top of my lung's at them, but I remebered to keep my temper while around my brother. He doesn't need any more stress then he already has.

I simply stood up, exscused myself and went into the hallway. I needed some alone time to process what just happened into my mind, but nope! I didnt get that thank's to Antonio, he followed right behind me, talked to me for a while, and lured me into a storeing room. I wonder if the two remaining in the room are wondering what's taking us so long, or more importantly- what the sound's were coming from the closet.

The sound's were moan's of pleasure and desire, indeed me and Antonio were having sex. It's not like we havent before, we've done it plenty of time's...Just not in a place so..Public.

A few minuates later we returned into the room noticing that Feli left along with his friend. Or at least that's what I hope they just are because; last time I checked friend's dont kiss eatchother, but I suppose if it bring's happiness to my brother, i'll let it slide.

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**Well enjoy this short and crappy chapter. I'm off to some hotel for two day's ;n; **  
**Honestly I didn't really want to go but my mum's forcing me to go -.- The hotel doesnt even have a pool so what's the fun of going? According to my mom (who's really the only one who want's to go..) we are also going to look at a mountain .-.**  
**Oh yeah, Like I said in the last chapter this story i gaurenteed you will get more and more perverted (If I decide to finish it 'cause im looseing new thing's for this story and more for another story that is yet to come out)!~**

**Off to writing chapter 5 (in mah notebook..Stupid two day vacation :I)**  
**Adios Amigo's!~**


	5. Update

**For me it's the first day of school, I promised myself I would make a story update but if i did it wouldent be a long chapter and it wouldent be very good, so I decided to write this tiny little update insted telling you what may be happening, like it taking extra time for updates and bla bla bla... Now that you know that I wont feel guilty for shorter chapters and taking long for updates.**

~Jenna360


	6. Chapter 5

**HOLY FUCK! It has been so long since I updated this story and oncemore I must apologize oTL The last time that I updated with a real chapter I belive was when it was my birthday, so exactly one month and two days (I still havent got one birthday present from my family...And im consitered the "baby" of the family since I'm the youngest.)**

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Feliciano had been outside of the hospital for a few days now, the Italian has been considering some thing's that his brother would talk to him about. Those things being in relation to the main goal, to get him to stop cutting. Sadly, even though Feliciano knew the consiquences he refused to give up his blades and stop. That was understandable, since whenever he would get upset he would cut. The thing that his brother did not understand is why he didn't want to go to therapy to get help, maybe it was a personal issue or maybe it was just his personal phobia, either way there was no possibility of him speaking to a stranger about his issues.

Right at the moment the two italian brothers were discussing that topic, of course Lovino was trying his best to understand his brothers reasoning of why he didnt want to get the help he needed but on the other hand Feli wasnt cooperating in the talk they were having.

"Fratello, I dont want to go to the therapist!~" The younger whined.

"Why not? He will help you."

"Because I dont want to, thats why."

"Is there a reason in perticular?"

"No, and this discussion is over now!" He yelled then storming off to his room, grumbling somthing under his breath. The last time he got like that was when he was truly dissapointed, so Lovino knew to bring the topic up later on when he simmered down. He thought at first to apologize for whatever he did to anger his underling but then he saw a sign on the door.

_Do Not Enter!_

So he just turned away and tuned in on the TV.

Ludwig, who Feliciano called explained to him that the therapist were not that bad. Still he was curious to why he didnt want to go he felt that something important was being kept a secret from him, that strange feeling in his gut only grew stronger when he heard how upset his boyfriend was. He decided that he would figure out what that secret was one way or another.

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**Yes, another short and crappy chapter because I have writers block and school isnt really helping my brain function correctly. Just be happy I'm updateing this because it could be even LONGER for the next one.**


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